I haven't took my heart back

My heart's not with me. Haha. Lame, i mean, of course its still there, pumping and relaxing, but what i'm trying to say is i kinda lost my heart to someone. Again?! I admit this is not the first time. I mean come on, living in urban areas will somehow make you look at people and eventually have a crush on. However, i believe seriously this is not only crush. It has love in it too. Well because what i feel is like to be really good to this person. Be as NICE as possible before we both leave to our universities. Okay, i'll give you a little hint on who this person is. We are from the same class, J1 in college. The person is going to russia. Well i came to blog today not to actually state who is the person, but to let out my feelings that has a composition of love, misses, sadness and happiness all out. The last 5 days i spend with the person in lincoln was too good. I felt i had the time of my life. Well during the exam week, i kept my eyes on the person. But we were in different classes. I felt it was cruel in a way cause two days before exam when i went to church, i prayed to god hoping the person and myself will be in the same class. However we were not. I didnt get too upset instead i took it as a god's blessings. Well that will keep me more focused during the exam. But god did grant me something. The person was in the next class. So, i mean i will still get to see the person before exam and that gave me a little boost to do well in exam. With my heart pounding and my eyes jolting out when i saw my new sweetheart, i constantlty told myself to keep my emotions low. I have full contol of myself, so i know how to handle my emotions. I am a devoted person. I'm very well behaved in front of the person. Control la. Haha. And yea, another thing, i love the BEP's boom boom pow. My heart boom boom pow's whenever i see the person. During the exam week, i had my mp3 on me all the time. And i was listening to boom boom pow. Well the reason is, when i see the person and i hear the song, i feel so great. I really like the person la. At this point of time, i feel all my love is only for that someone. It started in the last weeks of may. I dont know how i could be so blind before this. I dunno what i was doing for the past five months when the first day i went to c0llege i got to know this person that is on the January 6, 20o9. My instinct told me that i would like this person because the person was not bad looking. But i didnt bother the look at that time. I didn't even care. Partially cause of the person's gang and stuff. However after the incident on friday on the last week of may, made my heart to stop for a beat and think about this person. And i got the answer not too late. The answer was, "yes the person is in my heart".

A message to my love :

I dunno if you are reading this. And you wouldn't even know if its you. But if you know me, and if you have sensed whatever we have been through in the last 5 days in lincoln, you will know who you are. I gave u, a toblerone chocolate which i gave alot of people also. I know it will be hard for you to know whether its you. Another hint, i messaged you on friday night (July 10 2009) The message was wishing you good luck in your future university which you didnt reply, i dunno why, and made me keep on checking my phone the whole saturday morning. I also, dunno if that's your number because i got the number from my friend who is also your friend. I know i have tangled things so much, that you wouldn't know if its you. But sweetheart, i want you to know that you are my boom boom pow, now and always. A final hint, we spend lotsa time in the lift, almost everyday. I miss you love.